Now with added nutrients.
Gorgeous!! Really, PK, well done.
Congrats to you both...wonderful writing.
I'm curious to know which two lines and two words you wish you'd cut. I liked it as it is, though I felt a little dim redoing the chronology and making sense out of things.
I would cut the final line. There's also a line that got repeated somehow, and I would remove one instance of it. And I would cut the words "I'm saved."Yuck, I just even hate writing about this piece now. It isn't that I hate it, I just like it a lot less than I liked it when I submitted it. So maybe it's good that I was a bit impulsive, because if I was staring at the thing now, I'd probably never send it out.
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