Finally...

I hate it when my procrastination is foiled. Finally, the server is up!

Holiday Surprise: Elf Balls (haha)
If you have kids, this is a good way to keep them occupied on Christmas Eve, or you can put these in the stockings, or whatever. Heard about them from an old college friend, whose parents used these to stop the whining about friends who got to open presents on Xmas eve. The parents would sneak them onto the mantle while they were leaving for Xmas eve service, so the kids would find them when the family returned. The parents said, Oh, the elves must have come by ahead of Santa and left these for you.
You take a roll of crepe streamer, unroll it, and tape little goodies (candy, little toys, whatever) all along it, every foot or so, then wrap it back up into a ball. Cheap, simple, and keeps kids occupied for ages while they unroll it. Plus, the cat gets all worked up over the streamers after they're unstrung.

FF(FM): Once, I was naked in a dressing room a mere 1/2 hour before Harrison Ford. I missed him by a measly 30 minutes, but it's probably better because, although I am not typically impressed by celebrity, it was pre-midlife-crisis Harrison Ford, for cryin' outloud. I would have made an idiot out of myself. In any case, the incident will play a big role in my fantasy life once I hit senility, at which point I'll conveniently forget about that pesky 1/2 hour and add a lot of interesting, non-existent details.